It’s cold in here, colder than I thought it would be. For the past nine months I was pretty warm, but knew toward the end something would be happening. Up until then though, it had been decent for me. But then, what do I know about decent? I haven’t been around all that long.
Warm is all I cared about back then. Well, that and food. Mom seemed to eat well. She must have, ’cause I don’t remember any days being hungry.
It’s amazing what you can hear in there, too. I could hear a lot. Sometimes music. Well, a lot of times music. The music always came with a lot of jiggling, too. ‘Dancing’ was what I heard it called; see, it’s amazing the things you hear. Mom did a lot of dancing over the past few months. I kind of liked it. I can’t wait to do it with her myself.
I heard a lot of yelling, though. I guess that happens, but I don’t like that very much. She was always shouting with some guy; my dad I’d guess. Sometimes it was about me. You can hear a lot more than you think in there. I hope I don’t run into a lot of that yelling stuff when I get bigger. I like dancing; shouting, not so much.
Wow, come to think of it, it really is cold in here. Not just colder than I thought it would be, but really, really cold. I just had this feeling that once I was out here they’d try to keep me as warm as I was back inside.
You know, it’s dark, too. I mean, maybe that’s how it’s supposed to be, but I wouldn’t have thought so. I had this dream that, once I came into the world, there would be lights and others like me and sounds. Not just the sounds I heard when I was inside, but all kinds of new sounds. I just thought I would. I could be wrong. I mean, what do I know? I haven’t been around all that long.
That’s something, too. There’s no one else. I mean, in this dark, there’s even less noise than before. Oh, I hear noises, but they seem so far off. They are different sounds, but I can’t make them out from here. All I hear the darkness is my own echo when I cry. I mostly cry because it’s cold and now I am so hungry. It’s weird that mom isn’t nearby. She used to be so close and was so good about getting food to me. And I was warm.
Maybe that’s how I’m supposed to be: cold and hungry and lonely.
How would I know? I haven’t been around all that long.